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March 26, 2008:
Wow, a new year already. So far it has been a very interesting one. New Year's Eve came and went. I finally got all of my Christmas decorations back in their places and was excited to see what the New Year would reveal. Everything was going along fine when one day I woke with stiffness in my legs that I hadn't felt in along time. I knew in my heart what was happening but stubbornly refused to believe it. I just fluffed it off to a pulled muscle or something from working out too hard. (I had to get those holiday pounds off as soon as possible).
By the end of that cold January day I could hardly walk. The reality set in pretty quickly. I was having a Multiple Sclerosis attack. After about three days I finally cried "uncle" and called my neurologist. He said he could see me right away. When he walked into the examining room his first words were "I'm not glad to see you". I knew exactly how he felt, I wasn't too happy to be there myself for the reason I was there. We both knew the only way to see how much trouble I might be in was to do a series of MRI's. Soon I was lying on a small sliding table for several hours being pulled in and out of a tube that emitted very loud and scary sounds. The technician kept apologizing for the length of time it was taking but I didn't really care. I just wanted to know what I was facing. With as much excitement as the doctor could have, he reported to me that I have a new liaison on my spine but that is all. I tell you this because it could have been so much worse. Little by little my walking has gotten better. My feet are still a bit numb but I can at least now point my legs in the direction they need to go and they respond. Now, I was hesitant sharing this with you because I didn't want to sound too "poor me". Believe me, that isn't why I am writing you this. I want to tell you about the grace of our Lord through all this. MS can leave many feeling hopeless and totally helpless. I have felt that in the past and was really more frightened of that than what my legs might be doing. Through all of this experience I have felt the Lord's presence so strongly. He has been my shield and protector from any pity parties I really might have wanted to have. What has been so obvious to me during this trial is the awareness that we don't walk through these valleys alone. My calmness in this situation has taken me by surprise at times. I can only say it is because of the Father's amazing strength, love and peace that passes all understanding and the prayers of my Christian family. So, I guess I can look at the New Year with the excitement and anticipation I always have. As long as He is guiding my steps I'll be in good shape. Love to you all, Denise View archived journal entries: January 20, 2012 August 16, 2010 October 13, 2009 May 28, 2009 December 10, 2008 July 29, 2008 March 26, 2008 December 18, 2007 October 11, 2007 July 21, 2007 March 23, 2007 December 14, 2006 October 10, 2006 June 26, 2006 March 15, 2006 December 20, 2005 October 24, 2005 June 20, 2005 March 15, 2005 December 17, 2004 September 9, 2004 June 2, 2004 February 15, 2004 November 7, 2003 August 5, 2003 June 10, 2003 January 11, 2003 July 28, 2002 May 15, 2002 March 18, 2002 January 1, 2002 October 22, 2001 September 21, 2001 August 15, 2001 June 21, 2001 May 15, 2001 March 27, 2001 |
