March 15th 2006: These past months have been a time of celebrations, birthdays and anniversaries for me. We all celebrated the start of a new year with new hopes and prayers for the new-year ahead. I did have some sadness about things I didn't get done that I promised myself I'd do this past year. Let's see, I didn't learn to play the guitar, speak a foreign language or organize my closets. I seem to promise myself this every year. Oh well, I do have a new year to try again. I did however have one of the best years of traveling and meeting some incredible people. My heart is full of the memories of the new friends I met on my travels and old friends that I reconnected with again. My prayer is that I was as much of a blessing to them as they were and are to me. We celebrated my parent's fiftieth wedding anniversary. That was a wonderful blessing. Now for the Birthday part, I am not a big fan of those. People always nicely say "well, they are better than the alternative". I have to write that on some mornings I have to wonder if this is true. The aches and pains and the mirror can be scary. But I always thank the Lord for another day and figure He must have a reason for me to still be around, so I go on with the joy He has placed in my heart. Now that leaves me to write about my favorite celebration, anniversary and "birthday" of sorts, February 17th, 1993. It is the day that I received this overwhelming joy of the Lord. What started out as the worst day of my life ended up being the absolute best day.

In my narrow world's view I had finally come to the end of myself on that day. All the things I thought that mattered in my life were being stripped away from me. My health was failing and my career was at an all time low. I felt like my life was literally caving in around me. I had always thought that no matter what, I could count on myself but on this day I was totally aware that it wasn't enough. I had the doctor's words of doom hanging over my head and I had just lost my best client. In my desperation I cried out to God with all that was in me and said the words that seemed to really get His attention. I screamed "Lord, I give up!" It seems that this was what He had been waiting to hear me say all my life. The presence of the Lord came into my life that day in a way that He never had before. It changed me completely. I knew that I didn't have to just depend on myself. I didn't have to be super woman anymore. Suddenly it wasn't about me, it was all about Him. I regret that it took so much and so long for me to get this point but at least the Father didn't let me continue in my ignorance. He made sure I knew this wonderful fact.

If you have read my bio, book or heard me speak on any occasion I have talked about this event. I think it's so important that we all come to this realization. As followers of Christ, it's not all about us and our lives; it's all about Him and His plan for our lives.

Birthdays, anniversaries and new years come and go, but we are eternal because of His sacrifice. Thank you Lord.


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