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January 20, 2012:
It's been way too long since I sat down to write on my journal page. I really don't know why I take so long sometimes but life can get in the way. I'm sure I'm not any busier than any of you but I always hope to have something profound to share. Every day of life lately seems profound though. I don't know that I like this profoundness on a daily basis.
It can be overwhelming.
Now, as a Christian often times I think I should not feel the weight of the world because I have the joy of Heaven. I know the "big picture" and in the end, Christians win!!! Unfortunately it's here on earth that we can get kicked around. Sometimes the reality of life is too real. I myself was so excited to see the New Year come in. I recently wrote to a pastor I love that I had had all the "grown up" lessons I cared to have for awhile. In 2011 I saw too many folks I love suffering. It might be because they have lost a loved one, a job, a marriage, a dream... hope. Believe me, I know all the verses in the Word that I can use to try to be of help to them but they kind of fall on dull ears when someone is numb from the pain of it all. I recently went through pain in my life that I had never experienced before. My two very dearest friends here in Nashville died within a month of each other. I moved here over thirty years ago from Alabama and as they say, "you're born with your biological family and the friends in your life are the family you pick." These two friends, they were my picked family. One was a beautiful lady, Evelyn, that I had had the honor of teaching Manners Classes with for over ten years. She was beautiful in so many ways; she truly loved those she loved. I was fortunate that she loved me. I miss her everyday. The other friend was my dear Maurice, who I wrote songs with, sang with, laughed with, cried with, counted on for faith talks, and expected the truth from. He has the voice of an angel. He was one of the pastors at mine and Doug's wedding. He never stopped amazing me. There will probably never be any two other people except for my biological family and husband that will ever be that close to me. I hope I'm wrong but it's hard to imagine. One thing that this experience has taught me, we need to hold those we love and still have in our lives a lot closer. We need to pray for good days with them. We need to make beautiful memories that will carry us through the sometimes "rotten days" until we see that hope we have, Heaven. I know Evelyn and Maurice are there now cheering me on. I sort of envy them getting to see the Lord, Jesus before I got to but I'm sure they'll be there to welcome me when I get there. Until then, I plan on making some changes in 2012. I am going to try to grasp how wonderful life here is. I know I am blessed. I am healthy, loved, and most of all I am sure of the only hope that is reality. I am His child. I will see all my loved ones that know the Lord, Jesus there in Heaven and we will spend eternity together. Have a wonderful new year, Denise View archived journal entries: January 20, 2012 August 16, 2010 October 13, 2009 May 28, 2009 December 10, 2008 July 29, 2008 March 26, 2008 December 18, 2007 October 11, 2007 July 21, 2007 March 23, 2007 December 14, 2006 October 10, 2006 June 26, 2006 March 15, 2006 December 20, 2005 October 24, 2005 June 20, 2005 March 15, 2005 December 17, 2004 September 9, 2004 June 2, 2004 February 15, 2004 November 7, 2003 August 5, 2003 June 10, 2003 January 11, 2003 July 28, 2002 May 15, 2002 March 18, 2002 January 1, 2002 October 22, 2001 September 21, 2001 August 15, 2001 June 21, 2001 May 15, 2001 March 27, 2001 |
